The Way I Am - Ingrid Michaelson

Honestly uh, one day I will get poisoned from chewing on plastic too much. Chewing on my cable ties, chewing on straws, chewed on plastic forks, chewed on straws, chewed on straws, chewed more straws and more cable ties and straws and cable ties and cable ties.....

I cannot stop chewing, I kind of think that it's my alternative to smoking. I am trying to curb sthe cravings that strike every 5 – 7 minutes. Yes, I did calculate the intervals. It’s not like I have a lot of cash to spare right? And not like I have many $11.20’s to go around tarring my lungs and all right?

That’s not the point. I’ve concurred that I should stop, regardless of whatever reasons I may come up with to not quit but yes, I have to. I just have to.

The sporadic screaming and random tsunamis of sudden PMS attacks when it’s not even PMS season is just bloody draining. Still don’t know what’s going on and it shall remain status quo until things start to brighten up. I don’t know when, how or what, but I truly madly deeply hope that I don’t die before the quarantine ends.

I still want to do school stuff like walk to school and grumble, feeling the wind in my hair which will never ever get out of my fais. Talk about boys, music and what not. Talk to Kimmy, Lizzy and Stevie about random happenings and crack into hysterical fits when Kimmy/Stevie does something like robot dancing whilst saying the phrase which is coincidently someone’s name. Or just sleeping in my hoodie on Food Haven’s horribly dirty tables but I don’t really care because I’m so tired and all.

I miss school, a lot, probably because it’s my sole distraction from frustrating stuff like _________ and sometimes _________.

Every day, every single fucking day, I convince myself that there are at least 3.5 billion of people out there who are in a state far off than I am in.

Labels: friends, random, RP